Conflicts Shouldn't Be Hidden but Dealt With Honestly and Openly For the Benefit of Everyone

Editors note: All names are fictitious so as to protect the identities of those involved

I would like to share an experience about a conflict that happened in our community and what we enlightened to in the process of dealing with it. Fellow practitioner Cing told me that she often went to the countryside to distribute materials highlighting the facts about Falun Gong and why the persecution is a violation of human rights. When the practitioners went out they went in pairs, and she was working with Practitioner Dong.

When they began delivering materials, they found that they often had different opinions on how to deal with things. Whenever she started to speak, practitioner Dong grew angry with her. Practitioner Cing did not talk back. But when they moved to the next village, she asked the coordinator if she could work with someone else. So she began to work with practitioner Bau instead. They soon finished their work and returned home safely. Cing didn't feel quite right about what had happened and began to look within. She couldn't quite figure out what she had done wrong and so she talked it over with me.

After sharing and discussing, we realised that having different opinions is normal. But why do we have conflicts? We know that stubborn arguing is definitely wrong. But it's also wrong to sweep our conflicts under the carpet. Master said:

"When any conflict arises or anything happens, I've told you that not only should the two parties in the conflict look for reasons on their part, even any third party should think about himself--why are you the one who observed it? When you are a direct party in the conflict, that's even more the case, but why won't you cultivate yourself?" (Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Chicago Conference)

When a conflict arises, we avoid addressing what has happened and we may look like we are being tolerant and forgiving yet since we are not being truthful we are not in the Fa at all. If it's our own problem, and we didn't look at the other side, the problem will still exist. If it's the other person's problem, we should also look inward and cultivate ourselves. The other person was angry with me. Why? Do I have some attachment? If we have determined that it is indeed the other person's problem, can we point it out to him in a kind manner? When we just try to avoid the conflict, we are not being responsible to ourselves, to the other person or to the Fa-Rectification. It is an action of protecting self; a behaviour of selfishness.

So when a conflict happens, what should we do? First, we should look inward to see if it's our problem. If it is, then we should rectify it immediately. If it's the other person's problem, we should also seriously look inward and at the same time point it out to the other person in a kind manner. Teacher said,

"Every Dafa disciple is cultivating, every person is walking his own path, and each person still has human attachments, which is why you can still cultivate. Then the human attachments will show. Don't be unwilling to work with other students when there are conflicts or differences of opinion. Keep in mind that all of you have been through that state, and from time to time each person may experience that state. You should forgive others and be understanding of others, and you should help each other. To be able to work together and do well the things that Dafa disciples do to validate the Fa--now that's what you should do." (Teaching the Fa at the 2004 Western U.S. Fa Conference).